This story might strike a cord with some of you.
It seems there were these islands in which the United States had some interests. The islands had once been the possession of Spain but we won them in the Spanish-American War. Later we built and occupied military bases on these beautiful lush green islands filled with equally beautiful brown skinned people. From the beginning there was trouble. These proud people demanded to be free. Our two cultures clashed on many levels. There was strong resistance to American dominance of their economy and territory. They also object to “Gringos” marrying their beautiful young women. They even tried to assassinate a United States President!
No, it is not the Philippines. I refer to the island of Puerto Rico and her sister island, Vieques. For those geographically challenged, these are two small islands about 90 miles off the coast of Florida. While I served there, the “Independantistas” tried to assassinate my boss and did kill several sailors at Sebana Seca.
For years the people of Vieques have fought to eject the US Navy from their little island. The Navy has used half the island as a weapons testing area for almost 75 years. The ground is so contaminated no one will be able to use it for several hundred years and fishing is restricted. Even though the ejection of the Navy would gain the people of Vieques nothing; their pride demands the removal of these crude uncouth intruders. I was once almost assaulted by a 350 pound woman protesting our being on her island.
After years of demonstrations and arrests Congress decided to pull the Navy and return the island to Puerto Rican control. The government has not disclosed what it will do with this contaminated pile of rock filled with unexploded ordinance but they at least they have successfully ejected the imperialist barbarians.
Actions have consequences. Always be careful what you wish for, you may get it. On the nearby island of Puerto Rico the Navy has a huge complex called “Roosevelt Roads Naval Air Station.” It employed over 1,200 civilians. There were over 700 military families living and working in the area. Each year they pumped 300 million dollars into the local economy. Entire Puerto Rican communities depended on “Rosy Roads” for their existence. Because we no longer test our pilots and equipment on Vieques, the US government decided they no longer needed this expensive facility and closed it.
Suddenly the Governor, Sila Calderon, held a news conference in San Juan, protesting the base closure and stating, “The people of Puerto Rico don’t now nor ever did have an interest in closing the Vieques bombing range or Roosevelt Roads. We are interested in both staying in Puerto Rico.”
After years of German protests, “Yankee Go Home”, the US government has announced it will pull American troops out of Germany. That will mean a six BILLION dollar annual loss to the German economy. There will be a lot of businesses which will have to close their doors. Thousands will be forced to stop their schooling. I am sure some of the rich Germans will make a lot of money selling old US military land and facilities but the vast majority of “little” people will suffer an economic down turn..
Personally, I think America should pull all its troops from every country around the world. Stationing troops in other countries is counter-productive. It has no real strategic military value and is actually just US “welfare” for other countries. That "welfare" creates a balance of payments problem and a drain on the American economy. It is almost like we are trying to buy or bribe friends and that never does not works well.
We are not ”Big Brother” or the world’s police force. While I support humanitarian aid, without caveats, our intrusion into the internal affairs of other nations seldom comes out well and is usually not appreciated by those nations. It is time for other nations to “police” themselves. Beyond simple economics and the strategic waste, the American military is not our best export. Unlike Filipinos, Americans often do not adapt well to other cultures. We have a tendency to be our own worst enemy and create a cultural backlash such as we had in this country.
America has the finest fighting force in the world... but we lack some grassroots diplomatic and adaptive skills.
Just the humble opinion of an old war dog…..
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
BARRIO GIRL
I had this foreign friend who was married to a sweet beautiful little “barrio” girl. One day in casual conversation he said, “My wife is an idiot!” I felt very sad for him. I knew his wife and he was the “idiot” not her. With all his academic credentials he failed to appreciate one simple truth.
“We are all idiots and geniuses depending on the subject”
There are many things about life here in the Philippines she could have taught him but he was not wise enough to listen to her. Because someone has not seen snow or ridden on a train does not make them an idiot. Just as you may not know which fish taste best and how to pick the freshest fish does not make you an idiot. We all have different life experiences.
The truly sad thing about my myopic friend was he missed the fantastic chance to increase his own knowledge and share with her the wonders of his life experiences.
I was in a hotel room with a friend who had spent her entire life in a simple fishing village. She had seen bamboo walls and painted concrete walls but she had never seen “wallpaper”. What followed was an interesting talk about how wallpaper is made and installed. How the pieces are matched and glued to the wall. We even talked about the history of wallpaper. Did you know that many historians think that the great French emperor Napoleon Bonaparte was killed by wallpaper? Napoleon was in exile and living in a villa. The walls of his bedroom had wallpaper with a green flocked pattern. To create this textured surface the manufacturer used arsenic and copper. In the warm tropical climate of St Helena the copper-arsenic together with mold produced a toxic gas. Historians think that over a protracted period of time Napoleon’s body absorbed enough of the poison gas that it killed him.
In the US Army Ranger School survival class the first rule is to “copy the natives”. They know better than you how to survive in their environment. I am constantly seeking knowledge from my Filipino friends. The very title of this column was changed from “purok” to “barrio” based on advice of a Filipina friend.
To my foreign friends instead of trying to change your Filipina wife or girlfriend into something she is not; glory in her uniqueness, in her special beauty. You should honor her and respect her. Explore her world; increase your own knowledge and life experiences. Turn your life into an adventure with her.
Be an Everyday Hero open your heart and your mind.
“We are all idiots and geniuses depending on the subject”
There are many things about life here in the Philippines she could have taught him but he was not wise enough to listen to her. Because someone has not seen snow or ridden on a train does not make them an idiot. Just as you may not know which fish taste best and how to pick the freshest fish does not make you an idiot. We all have different life experiences.
The truly sad thing about my myopic friend was he missed the fantastic chance to increase his own knowledge and share with her the wonders of his life experiences.
I was in a hotel room with a friend who had spent her entire life in a simple fishing village. She had seen bamboo walls and painted concrete walls but she had never seen “wallpaper”. What followed was an interesting talk about how wallpaper is made and installed. How the pieces are matched and glued to the wall. We even talked about the history of wallpaper. Did you know that many historians think that the great French emperor Napoleon Bonaparte was killed by wallpaper? Napoleon was in exile and living in a villa. The walls of his bedroom had wallpaper with a green flocked pattern. To create this textured surface the manufacturer used arsenic and copper. In the warm tropical climate of St Helena the copper-arsenic together with mold produced a toxic gas. Historians think that over a protracted period of time Napoleon’s body absorbed enough of the poison gas that it killed him.
In the US Army Ranger School survival class the first rule is to “copy the natives”. They know better than you how to survive in their environment. I am constantly seeking knowledge from my Filipino friends. The very title of this column was changed from “purok” to “barrio” based on advice of a Filipina friend.
To my foreign friends instead of trying to change your Filipina wife or girlfriend into something she is not; glory in her uniqueness, in her special beauty. You should honor her and respect her. Explore her world; increase your own knowledge and life experiences. Turn your life into an adventure with her.
Be an Everyday Hero open your heart and your mind.
THE OTHER SIDE
The people who disagree with me deserve a chance to be heard.
Rosa wrote:
Dear Mr. James:
I read your articles with interest, you write of our beautiful country from a foreigner's point of view. You have always been gracious about your being here.
One topic that perhaps many locals do not understand is your lavish praises for the Filipina girlfriends or "wives" of foreigners. Truth to tell, they are not our regular Filipinas. By their dressing and actions, they cannot be mistaken for the homegrown Filipinas. They are more western than Asian, perhaps to mimic or impress (?) their foreign partners.
Another topic we locals do not understand is the "May - December" relationship ( it is more February - November relationship) that you write about and we see all over. All told that is simply not the norm and was not until the foreigners started flaunting their money in front of these girls.
You can very very rarely see an old regular Filipino (sixty or seventy years old) with a 16 or 17 or 20 years old Filipina. It just is not a regular relationship. The sensible older Filipino marries a reasonably mature Filipina, not a teen-ager.
What we see are old foreigners with one or two skimpily dressed Filipinas hanging on as if it was the most normal thing in the Filipino culture.
Even in Europe and America, the average older men are not seen with girls 20 or 30 years old younger than them. They would be the ultimate laughing stock pair! Fortunately for the foreigners here, the locals are to polite to laugh in their faces and call them dirty old men or naive fools. Even without words, the foreigners must know what the locals think.
Maybe there will be rare exceptions to what I write, but the odds are 1 or 2 to a hundred. It is almost as disgusting as the child bride of India; what makes it different is the foreigner and the young Filipina profess Love instead of the word manipulation.
After all is said, one thing is clear: this old Foreigner-young Filipina syndrome has corrupted the real Filipino culture and moral values. It has fallen to a business transaction with each side trying to get the most out of the other.
Try standing on our side looking out and see if it isn’t disgusting.
Rosa
If you read my column “EVIL” you would know I agree with you about the DOM relationships based on lies and deception. Where we part company is when you assume that all of these DOM relationships are false. I object to you taking it upon yourself to be judge and punisher of people you do not know.
Back when I first started writing this column a young Filipina wrote me a poignant tribute to her older foreign husband. She had been a young widow struggling to raise her children and keep a roof over their head and food on their table. Her life was slowly falling apart. Without a father, her children were beginning to make bad choices. This “old foreigner” sold his home in America and risked everything to come here and marry her. Their “May-December” love turned tragedy into a true love story. Together they created a loving functional “family”. I later met this couple and you could feel the love and respect they had for each other. I object to you calling her a “gold-digger, whore and prostitute” just because she fell in love with someone older than her.
You make several bold statements of “fact” that are really just your opinion. First you say these “May-December” relationships are “not the norm”. Who says it is not normal? Check the Bible. These “May-December” relationships have been going on for thousands of years. There are no laws against them. There are no scriptures against them. These relationships pose no real threat to society and are the “private” business of two adults. They hurt no one. They do not threaten society. Even the “May-December” relationships based on lies hurt only themselves.
You say these DOM relationships are not “a regular relationship”. You say that normal Filipinos chose people their own age to marry. As they say in the courtroom, “You assume facts not in evidence”. You assume that because older Filipinos usually chose brides in their own age group, they would not chose a younger bride if they could. The fact that “Dolphy” and others marry young brides proves that elderly Filipinos would marry young girls if the young girls would have them. The choice is not the elderly Filipinos; the choice is in the hands of the young Filipinas. That is how it should be; their choice not yours. You try to slime these “May-December” relationships by comparing them to the “disgusting … child bride of India” You must be truly disingenuous and desperate. How do you compare a free choice made by two adults to the selling of innocent children?
You claim “in Europe and America, the average older man is not seen with a girl 20 or 30 years younger than him.” I do not know where you get your “facts” (?). “May-December” marriages and even the marriages of total strangers have been practiced many thousands of years around the world, including Europe and America. Even if you were accurate in your claim, which you are not, the existence or non-existence of these DOM relationships does not negate their right to exist. Two adults have the right to associate and marry whom they wish without your approval.
“Locals are too polite to laugh in their faces and call them dirty old men or naive fools.” I admit that most Pinoy’s are very gracious and polite. One of the many characteristics I admire about the Pinoy culture. But the people you speak of are NOT “too polite”. They are foul mouthed cowards. They use the foreigner’s ignorance of Visyan to verbally assault the young Filipina in public. They call her ugly names and ask her ugly personal questions about her sex life. If I did this to your mother you would be justifiably outraged but people like you feel free to do it to this young Filipina simply because she loves a man older than her. You do not know if her love is real but you still set yourself up as the judge and punisher.
You claim that “this old Foreigner-young Filipina syndrome has corrupted the real Filipino culture and moral values.” How? How has the free choice of two adults changed your life or your society? These kinds of relationships have been going on here and around the world for centuries. You still live by your values. Nobody has forced you to change your lifestyle or morals. Without searching, I know of three Filipino families where the father openly breaks his marriage vows with any woman who will lay down with him. I read in the newspaper where fathers molest their own children. My own “wife’s” uncle was murdered and the killer was set free. If you want to protect the “real” Filipino culture and moral values get outraged at these breaches and leave the relationship of consenting adults alone. They are not yours to judge or punish. That job belongs to God.
“Try standing on our side looking out and see if it isn’t disgusting.” Those “false” DOM relationships based on economics punish themselves. The “May-December” relationships based on real love deserve our respect and to be honored. Your problem is you punish EVERYONE with your ugly words and contempt. You could use a little Christian compassion and empathy.
Rosa wrote:
Dear Mr. James:
I read your articles with interest, you write of our beautiful country from a foreigner's point of view. You have always been gracious about your being here.
One topic that perhaps many locals do not understand is your lavish praises for the Filipina girlfriends or "wives" of foreigners. Truth to tell, they are not our regular Filipinas. By their dressing and actions, they cannot be mistaken for the homegrown Filipinas. They are more western than Asian, perhaps to mimic or impress (?) their foreign partners.
Another topic we locals do not understand is the "May - December" relationship ( it is more February - November relationship) that you write about and we see all over. All told that is simply not the norm and was not until the foreigners started flaunting their money in front of these girls.
You can very very rarely see an old regular Filipino (sixty or seventy years old) with a 16 or 17 or 20 years old Filipina. It just is not a regular relationship. The sensible older Filipino marries a reasonably mature Filipina, not a teen-ager.
What we see are old foreigners with one or two skimpily dressed Filipinas hanging on as if it was the most normal thing in the Filipino culture.
Even in Europe and America, the average older men are not seen with girls 20 or 30 years old younger than them. They would be the ultimate laughing stock pair! Fortunately for the foreigners here, the locals are to polite to laugh in their faces and call them dirty old men or naive fools. Even without words, the foreigners must know what the locals think.
Maybe there will be rare exceptions to what I write, but the odds are 1 or 2 to a hundred. It is almost as disgusting as the child bride of India; what makes it different is the foreigner and the young Filipina profess Love instead of the word manipulation.
After all is said, one thing is clear: this old Foreigner-young Filipina syndrome has corrupted the real Filipino culture and moral values. It has fallen to a business transaction with each side trying to get the most out of the other.
Try standing on our side looking out and see if it isn’t disgusting.
Rosa
If you read my column “EVIL” you would know I agree with you about the DOM relationships based on lies and deception. Where we part company is when you assume that all of these DOM relationships are false. I object to you taking it upon yourself to be judge and punisher of people you do not know.
Back when I first started writing this column a young Filipina wrote me a poignant tribute to her older foreign husband. She had been a young widow struggling to raise her children and keep a roof over their head and food on their table. Her life was slowly falling apart. Without a father, her children were beginning to make bad choices. This “old foreigner” sold his home in America and risked everything to come here and marry her. Their “May-December” love turned tragedy into a true love story. Together they created a loving functional “family”. I later met this couple and you could feel the love and respect they had for each other. I object to you calling her a “gold-digger, whore and prostitute” just because she fell in love with someone older than her.
You make several bold statements of “fact” that are really just your opinion. First you say these “May-December” relationships are “not the norm”. Who says it is not normal? Check the Bible. These “May-December” relationships have been going on for thousands of years. There are no laws against them. There are no scriptures against them. These relationships pose no real threat to society and are the “private” business of two adults. They hurt no one. They do not threaten society. Even the “May-December” relationships based on lies hurt only themselves.
You say these DOM relationships are not “a regular relationship”. You say that normal Filipinos chose people their own age to marry. As they say in the courtroom, “You assume facts not in evidence”. You assume that because older Filipinos usually chose brides in their own age group, they would not chose a younger bride if they could. The fact that “Dolphy” and others marry young brides proves that elderly Filipinos would marry young girls if the young girls would have them. The choice is not the elderly Filipinos; the choice is in the hands of the young Filipinas. That is how it should be; their choice not yours. You try to slime these “May-December” relationships by comparing them to the “disgusting … child bride of India” You must be truly disingenuous and desperate. How do you compare a free choice made by two adults to the selling of innocent children?
You claim “in Europe and America, the average older man is not seen with a girl 20 or 30 years younger than him.” I do not know where you get your “facts” (?). “May-December” marriages and even the marriages of total strangers have been practiced many thousands of years around the world, including Europe and America. Even if you were accurate in your claim, which you are not, the existence or non-existence of these DOM relationships does not negate their right to exist. Two adults have the right to associate and marry whom they wish without your approval.
“Locals are too polite to laugh in their faces and call them dirty old men or naive fools.” I admit that most Pinoy’s are very gracious and polite. One of the many characteristics I admire about the Pinoy culture. But the people you speak of are NOT “too polite”. They are foul mouthed cowards. They use the foreigner’s ignorance of Visyan to verbally assault the young Filipina in public. They call her ugly names and ask her ugly personal questions about her sex life. If I did this to your mother you would be justifiably outraged but people like you feel free to do it to this young Filipina simply because she loves a man older than her. You do not know if her love is real but you still set yourself up as the judge and punisher.
You claim that “this old Foreigner-young Filipina syndrome has corrupted the real Filipino culture and moral values.” How? How has the free choice of two adults changed your life or your society? These kinds of relationships have been going on here and around the world for centuries. You still live by your values. Nobody has forced you to change your lifestyle or morals. Without searching, I know of three Filipino families where the father openly breaks his marriage vows with any woman who will lay down with him. I read in the newspaper where fathers molest their own children. My own “wife’s” uncle was murdered and the killer was set free. If you want to protect the “real” Filipino culture and moral values get outraged at these breaches and leave the relationship of consenting adults alone. They are not yours to judge or punish. That job belongs to God.
“Try standing on our side looking out and see if it isn’t disgusting.” Those “false” DOM relationships based on economics punish themselves. The “May-December” relationships based on real love deserve our respect and to be honored. Your problem is you punish EVERYONE with your ugly words and contempt. You could use a little Christian compassion and empathy.
ILLNESS and INJURY
If your leg were broke, you would not just ignore it. You would seek proper medical attention. Not to see a doctor would be “stupid”. It could cause you to possibly lose your leg or even die.
If you have measles, you would not ignore it. You would seek proper medical treatment. Not to see a doctor would be “stupid.” Not to be treated would not only endanger you but the lives of others around you.
The human mind is like any other part of your body. Your mind can get sick or be injured. Not to seek help from a doctor is “stupid.” Not to seek proper medical help could cause the injury or illness to get worse and might even destroy your life. Mental illness and injury can be treated, controlled and even cured.
We are not ashamed of a broken leg. We are not ashamed of having the measles. But for some illogical reason nobody wants to admit they might have a “mind” that has been injured or is sick. There is an ugly fear, even stigma, of being diagnosed as mentally injured or mentally ill.
The usual response to aberrant behavior is to ignore it until it gets so bad you can ignore it no longer. You hide your “crazy” aunt in the back room. You tolerate your nutty uncle’s bad behavior and just avoid him. The shame of this is their illness may just be a chemical imbalance that could be cured with medication. They could possibly live “normal’ loving productive lives if someone cared enough to help them get proper treatment.
The Philippines has an excellent Mental Health Association. The local chapter is compassionately managed by Mrs. Aurora Caluscusin-Flores. The office is staffed by equally compassionate and highly professional people. The new patient is given a series of psychological tests and their condition is expertly diagnosed. With proper treatment many patients fully recover and lead normal lives.
How do I know all this? I am one of their patients. I suffer what is called “Anxiety Disorder; acerbated by Post Traumatic Stress Disorder”. I suffered a dysfunctional childhood and then was further traumatized by my military service. I take medication and undergo therapy sessions. Despite what my critics say I am not really “crazy”. My illness manifests itself in hypersensitivity and rages both of which I have been successful in controlling. Most people do not even know I have a medical problem. The shame is not in having a mental injury; the shame is not seeking proper treatment.
Substance addiction, beyond damaging the body, can also be an indication of possible mental problems. If your “loved one” is drunk every night, that is not normal. A friend of mine has a teenage son who pulled a knife on the maid and he is constantly physically abusing his little brother. He has serious separation anxiety and rage issues. He needs professional help before he kills someone. If you have a friend or relative who is subject to uncontrolled rage or anti-social behavior get them to the Philippine Mental Health Association and seek professional help. Mrs. Caluscusin-Flores and her staff are my Everyday Heroes for this week. Keep up the good work.
If you have measles, you would not ignore it. You would seek proper medical treatment. Not to see a doctor would be “stupid.” Not to be treated would not only endanger you but the lives of others around you.
The human mind is like any other part of your body. Your mind can get sick or be injured. Not to seek help from a doctor is “stupid.” Not to seek proper medical help could cause the injury or illness to get worse and might even destroy your life. Mental illness and injury can be treated, controlled and even cured.
We are not ashamed of a broken leg. We are not ashamed of having the measles. But for some illogical reason nobody wants to admit they might have a “mind” that has been injured or is sick. There is an ugly fear, even stigma, of being diagnosed as mentally injured or mentally ill.
The usual response to aberrant behavior is to ignore it until it gets so bad you can ignore it no longer. You hide your “crazy” aunt in the back room. You tolerate your nutty uncle’s bad behavior and just avoid him. The shame of this is their illness may just be a chemical imbalance that could be cured with medication. They could possibly live “normal’ loving productive lives if someone cared enough to help them get proper treatment.
The Philippines has an excellent Mental Health Association. The local chapter is compassionately managed by Mrs. Aurora Caluscusin-Flores. The office is staffed by equally compassionate and highly professional people. The new patient is given a series of psychological tests and their condition is expertly diagnosed. With proper treatment many patients fully recover and lead normal lives.
How do I know all this? I am one of their patients. I suffer what is called “Anxiety Disorder; acerbated by Post Traumatic Stress Disorder”. I suffered a dysfunctional childhood and then was further traumatized by my military service. I take medication and undergo therapy sessions. Despite what my critics say I am not really “crazy”. My illness manifests itself in hypersensitivity and rages both of which I have been successful in controlling. Most people do not even know I have a medical problem. The shame is not in having a mental injury; the shame is not seeking proper treatment.
Substance addiction, beyond damaging the body, can also be an indication of possible mental problems. If your “loved one” is drunk every night, that is not normal. A friend of mine has a teenage son who pulled a knife on the maid and he is constantly physically abusing his little brother. He has serious separation anxiety and rage issues. He needs professional help before he kills someone. If you have a friend or relative who is subject to uncontrolled rage or anti-social behavior get them to the Philippine Mental Health Association and seek professional help. Mrs. Caluscusin-Flores and her staff are my Everyday Heroes for this week. Keep up the good work.
EVIL REDUX
I have been inundated with a flood of support from Filipinas and Foreigners who are angry with petty small-minded black-hearted evil people who have been attacking Filipina-Foreigner relationships unchallenged for years. These evil people only have the courage to speak out in Visyan and hurt defenseless young Filipinas. Now, normally non-confrontational Filipinas are speaking out. The following email from a proud Filipina is typical of this new Pinoy voice that will not tolerate this abuse any longer..
Jinky writes:
“Hello, a good day to you. I am an avid reader of Negros Chronicle… I would like to react to (the)” Everyday Heroes” column by James KOJAK Hughs. I am a filipina married to a foreigner. I agree with what he has written in his July 22 ,2007 column. I would like to (stress) not all Filipina-Foreigner relationships are fake or ugly. Not all Filipina(s) who marry foreigners are “gold diggers” or just want to go out of the country in search for greener pastures. I know some people who are so shallow minded, judgmental and (vindictive) about us Filipinas married to foreigners. My relationship with my husband is built on love, trust,( and ) respect. My relationships with … past Filipino boyfriends didn't work out. I wanted to find my happiness; I wanted to love and be loved. What is wrong with that?... Being married is being happy. What is” wrong” (are these) people who think all Filipinas married to a foreigner are prostitutes and gold diggers!!”
In the past three years, I have been told of hundreds of these cowardly attacks made against innocent Filipinas. Filipinas, who have had to stand silently and unflinchingly as the vilest of comments were directed at them “IN PUBLIC!”
If some Foreigner had said these things to a Filipina married to a Filipino, the foreigner would have justifiably been attacked and punished. But these malicious cowardly attacks have, up to now, been silently tolerated. Maybe that silence has finally been broken. I applaud Jinky and the other Filipinas who refuse to apologize for loving and honoring their foreign husbands. Women who refuse to tolerate these cowardly attacks and are speaking out for justice, fairness and respect. Jinky, you and your modern Pinoy sisters are my Everyday Heroes for this week.
Jinky writes:
“Hello, a good day to you. I am an avid reader of Negros Chronicle… I would like to react to (the)” Everyday Heroes” column by James KOJAK Hughs. I am a filipina married to a foreigner. I agree with what he has written in his July 22 ,2007 column. I would like to (stress) not all Filipina-Foreigner relationships are fake or ugly. Not all Filipina(s) who marry foreigners are “gold diggers” or just want to go out of the country in search for greener pastures. I know some people who are so shallow minded, judgmental and (vindictive) about us Filipinas married to foreigners. My relationship with my husband is built on love, trust,( and ) respect. My relationships with … past Filipino boyfriends didn't work out. I wanted to find my happiness; I wanted to love and be loved. What is wrong with that?... Being married is being happy. What is” wrong” (are these) people who think all Filipinas married to a foreigner are prostitutes and gold diggers!!”
In the past three years, I have been told of hundreds of these cowardly attacks made against innocent Filipinas. Filipinas, who have had to stand silently and unflinchingly as the vilest of comments were directed at them “IN PUBLIC!”
If some Foreigner had said these things to a Filipina married to a Filipino, the foreigner would have justifiably been attacked and punished. But these malicious cowardly attacks have, up to now, been silently tolerated. Maybe that silence has finally been broken. I applaud Jinky and the other Filipinas who refuse to apologize for loving and honoring their foreign husbands. Women who refuse to tolerate these cowardly attacks and are speaking out for justice, fairness and respect. Jinky, you and your modern Pinoy sisters are my Everyday Heroes for this week.
THE “FILIPINA” PROMISE
Everyone has heard the sad story about the “American Promise”. How an American would come here to the Philippines and meet some sweet beautiful young Filipina. He will promise to marry her, then take advantage of her trusting nature and rob her of her innocence. Often these sweet girls would be left with fatherless children and shattered lives. Sadly there is some truth to these stories. It did / does happen; maybe not as often as some people think, but just once is too often. There is another side to this “ugly” human tragedy. There is the Filipina who robs the trusting foreigner of his money and crushes his dreams.
Over the last two years I have watched numerous foreigners get robbed and emotionally destroyed by ruthless Filipinas. There is Patrick who married a Filipina and started a local business. After a year of cheating on him with half of Dumaguete City, she finally took all his money and left him penniless on the streets. There is the Australian who built a 1.2 million peso home on another island only to have it stolen by his Filipina girlfriend. Heartbroken he come here and fell in love again. He built another beautiful home and his new girlfriend kicked him out and brought in her lover. Then there is the simple lad who sold his home in Ireland and married a Filipina. They started a nightclub in Manila. Next thing he knew, she had his 12 million pesos, the business and a new lover. He became another penniless human wreck on the streets of Dumaguete City. He has been befriended by some local Filipinos. I am watching to see if this trusting boy is being ripped off yet again.
I do not excuse or condone either of these life shattering crimes but I find it interesting that some Filipinos only condemn the “American Promise”. Filipinos make movies about the “American Promise”, but no one talks about the “Filipina Promise”. They talk about the “American Promise” in the classrooms at Silliman University and say vicious nasty things about people they do not even know. The consensus seems to be that old foolish foreigners deserve to be robbed and have their lives and dreams destroyed. That teacher who spewed those ugly attacks against foreigners in his classroom ought to borrow a text book on logic from the Philosophy Department. If it is wrong for foreigners to destroy Filipina lives; it is also wrong for Filipinas to destroy foolish old foreigners lives.
Be an Everyday Hero and cleanse your heart of prejudice and racism. We are all God’s children and deserve respect until we earn something less.
Over the last two years I have watched numerous foreigners get robbed and emotionally destroyed by ruthless Filipinas. There is Patrick who married a Filipina and started a local business. After a year of cheating on him with half of Dumaguete City, she finally took all his money and left him penniless on the streets. There is the Australian who built a 1.2 million peso home on another island only to have it stolen by his Filipina girlfriend. Heartbroken he come here and fell in love again. He built another beautiful home and his new girlfriend kicked him out and brought in her lover. Then there is the simple lad who sold his home in Ireland and married a Filipina. They started a nightclub in Manila. Next thing he knew, she had his 12 million pesos, the business and a new lover. He became another penniless human wreck on the streets of Dumaguete City. He has been befriended by some local Filipinos. I am watching to see if this trusting boy is being ripped off yet again.
I do not excuse or condone either of these life shattering crimes but I find it interesting that some Filipinos only condemn the “American Promise”. Filipinos make movies about the “American Promise”, but no one talks about the “Filipina Promise”. They talk about the “American Promise” in the classrooms at Silliman University and say vicious nasty things about people they do not even know. The consensus seems to be that old foolish foreigners deserve to be robbed and have their lives and dreams destroyed. That teacher who spewed those ugly attacks against foreigners in his classroom ought to borrow a text book on logic from the Philosophy Department. If it is wrong for foreigners to destroy Filipina lives; it is also wrong for Filipinas to destroy foolish old foreigners lives.
Be an Everyday Hero and cleanse your heart of prejudice and racism. We are all God’s children and deserve respect until we earn something less.
HOW TO CATCH A WILD PIG
This was told to me by Lowell E. Hedges, a retired professor. He was taught this little lesson by a young student who was a refugee from Central America. There is a lesson here not just for the Philippines but for the American Congress.
How to Catch a Wild Pig
First you find out where the wild pigs are roaming and feeding. You then put some corn out in an open field. Soon the pigs will come to eat the free corn. You keep putting out this free corn everyday. More wild pigs will come. After the pigs get used to your free corn, you put up a length of fence along one side of the open field. Soon the pigs will get accustomed to the fence. You keep giving them the free corn. Later you put up another section of fence at right angles to the first. You keep giving them the free corn. The pigs get used to the second fence. After awhile you put up a third section of fence at right angles to the second section. You now have a U-shaped fenced open area. You keep giving them free corn. Then you put another section of fence with a gate in it, making a closed area except for the gate. You keep giving them free corn. Now, the pigs are no longer out in the woods, working to find their own food. They get accustomed to the fenced area with the open gate. Then, one day you slam shut the gate trapping the wild pigs inside. They quickly lose their ability to find their wild food and become totally dependent on your free corn. They can not survive without you.
This is how communism and socialism works. They give you “free corn” until you are dependent on them. Until you lose your ability to support yourself. They rob you of your free spirit and your self respect. You become their domesticated worker pigs.
I see pictures of Che Quevara and hear socialist / communist propagandist all around Dumaguete City, especially at the universities. The “free corn” is very seductive. Communism / Socialism offer the illusion of ultimate equality, “free” medical care, and “free” homes and food. Marx said, “To each according to his abilities; to each according to his needs” The implication is that we would all be taken care of by the state. The sad reality is that great promise has never been fulfilled. Many have tried; all have failed.
With any form of government someone has to be in charge. Someone has to have the power to distribute the benefits. Those with power will eventually abuse it. They become the new elite. While millions wait in line for their free bread; the elite have theirs delivered. While millions live in no rent apartments; the elite have no rent homes and a dacha (summer cottage) on the Black Sea (Russia) or the Isle of Pines (Cuba). While millions wait for that doctor’s appointment; the elite have their own physician.
There is no difference between communism / socialism and any other corrupt government system. They all have “haves” and “have nots”, the privileged rich and the desperately poor. If that is true, why then is democracy preferable over communism? Simple, democracy and capitalism have one advantage over all other systems of government. The word is “CHANGE”. There is the possibility to change and improve. Not just change and improve the government but change and improve individually. There is social and economic mobility. The “have nots” can become the “haves”.
Rather than hunger for the false promise of socialism and communism, seek to change and improve the system you already have. You have the building blocks here to create the greatest nation in the Far East. Look around you. You have great climate, good resources, strategic location, hard working intelligent people, and an inordinate ability to adapt and change.
Are there problems to be solved here? Of course there are, but I believe the Philippine people not only can solve those problems but are well on the way to solving them now. Name another nation that has put a sitting President in jail for corruption. Many countries need to, but only the Philippines has actually done it. That is not a mark of shame but a badge of courage and commitment.
I believe in you, my Philippines; it is time for you to believe in yourself.
How to Catch a Wild Pig
First you find out where the wild pigs are roaming and feeding. You then put some corn out in an open field. Soon the pigs will come to eat the free corn. You keep putting out this free corn everyday. More wild pigs will come. After the pigs get used to your free corn, you put up a length of fence along one side of the open field. Soon the pigs will get accustomed to the fence. You keep giving them the free corn. Later you put up another section of fence at right angles to the first. You keep giving them the free corn. The pigs get used to the second fence. After awhile you put up a third section of fence at right angles to the second section. You now have a U-shaped fenced open area. You keep giving them free corn. Then you put another section of fence with a gate in it, making a closed area except for the gate. You keep giving them free corn. Now, the pigs are no longer out in the woods, working to find their own food. They get accustomed to the fenced area with the open gate. Then, one day you slam shut the gate trapping the wild pigs inside. They quickly lose their ability to find their wild food and become totally dependent on your free corn. They can not survive without you.
This is how communism and socialism works. They give you “free corn” until you are dependent on them. Until you lose your ability to support yourself. They rob you of your free spirit and your self respect. You become their domesticated worker pigs.
I see pictures of Che Quevara and hear socialist / communist propagandist all around Dumaguete City, especially at the universities. The “free corn” is very seductive. Communism / Socialism offer the illusion of ultimate equality, “free” medical care, and “free” homes and food. Marx said, “To each according to his abilities; to each according to his needs” The implication is that we would all be taken care of by the state. The sad reality is that great promise has never been fulfilled. Many have tried; all have failed.
With any form of government someone has to be in charge. Someone has to have the power to distribute the benefits. Those with power will eventually abuse it. They become the new elite. While millions wait in line for their free bread; the elite have theirs delivered. While millions live in no rent apartments; the elite have no rent homes and a dacha (summer cottage) on the Black Sea (Russia) or the Isle of Pines (Cuba). While millions wait for that doctor’s appointment; the elite have their own physician.
There is no difference between communism / socialism and any other corrupt government system. They all have “haves” and “have nots”, the privileged rich and the desperately poor. If that is true, why then is democracy preferable over communism? Simple, democracy and capitalism have one advantage over all other systems of government. The word is “CHANGE”. There is the possibility to change and improve. Not just change and improve the government but change and improve individually. There is social and economic mobility. The “have nots” can become the “haves”.
Rather than hunger for the false promise of socialism and communism, seek to change and improve the system you already have. You have the building blocks here to create the greatest nation in the Far East. Look around you. You have great climate, good resources, strategic location, hard working intelligent people, and an inordinate ability to adapt and change.
Are there problems to be solved here? Of course there are, but I believe the Philippine people not only can solve those problems but are well on the way to solving them now. Name another nation that has put a sitting President in jail for corruption. Many countries need to, but only the Philippines has actually done it. That is not a mark of shame but a badge of courage and commitment.
I believe in you, my Philippines; it is time for you to believe in yourself.
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