WHY?

Nothing happens without a reason. I have been doing something for some time now. I am going to share with you, for the first time, why I am doing it.

When I was nineteen, I sat in a crowded movie theater. While those all about me were laughing, I was quietly crying in the dark. The movie was “Some Like It Hot”, a comedy. In the movie, Tony Curtis and Marilyn Monroe shared a special love, a beautiful love. I wanted someone like that I could love and who could love me. I searched all my life, but never found that love… until now.

When I was first married, my wife had a lot of trouble sleeping. There had been a lot of violence and tragedy in her young life and she was plagued by horrible violent nightmares. She would wake in the middle of the night crying out in terror. While she was half awake, I held her trembling and whimpering in the darkness. As I held her tight, I would whisper reassuringly in her ear. “It is alright, Dear” “Your are safe, it is okay.” Just before she would dropped off to sleep again, ii would say softly, “Mahal Kita Walang Iba”. It has been a year now, and even though she now sleeps peacefully all night long; I still whisper softly those same four words as she drifts off to sleep.

Whenever she leaves the house to go to school, the market or visit her family; I stop whatever I am doing and see her off. It does not matter what I am doing, her departure is more important. I will stand by the gate, on the balcony or at one of the windows. I have asked her to always look back and find me. She now searches every place for my smile as he rides off. I want her to get into the habit of looking back and trying to find me. It is important. I have a special reason.

A wise man once said, “You live forever if someone remembers your name.” This is my bid for a little immortality.

My wife is much younger than I. One of these days, God will call me home and she will be left alone. When the pain of loss fades, she will start down that same road on her motorcycle; by habit she will look back for me. In that moment she will call my name. she will hear me softly say, “Mahal Kita Walang Iba” and for a brief instant, I will live again in her heart.

Who knows, maybe God will let me stand on that balcony and take care of her once again. That would be my heaven.